Figuring it Out

I have always struggled with anxiety, specifically OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). Not in the cute way that is portrayed within society these days but in the I washed my hands so many times a day that they were bleeding way. My struggle with this disorder has put a damper on my relationship with God because I have often found myself feeling that I needed to “fix” this “issue” before God and I could really connect. Fortunately, throughout the last 6-7 years, I have realized how absolutely absurd that way of thinking is. And I’ve been able to fix that incredibly broken way of thinking. Unfortunately, I do some backsliding on this and find myself having the same epiphany each and every time. The funny thing about mental health is that just when you think you’re “cured”, something happens and you feel like you’re back at square one. Over the past week or so I’ve experienced on of those setbacks. I blame it on hormones and entering the third trimester, plus what woman isn’t at least a little bit anxious knowing she’s about to be responsible for another life? This is uncharted territory, I think I’d be an anomaly if I was completely calm. But, […]

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Scripture for Healing

Whether you’re healing from a broken heart, period of depression, miscarriage, loss of a loved one, or any other pains of this world, I hope that these will provide you with a sense of peace and renewal. Many of these verses play back in my mind during times of need, like Isaiah 41:10, while I was waiting at the hospital before my last surgery. This is what the Lord says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears. I will heal you. 2 Kings 20:5 Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 Behold, I will bring it health and healing; I will heal them and reveal to them the abundance of peace and truth. Jeremiah 33:6 Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord. Psalm 27:14 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31 He heals the brokenhearted […]

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Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a topic that I have heard much about in the recent weeks. It has really been laying heavy on my heart and led me to some deep thinking. Dealing with a loss is tough. There is no owner’s manual on what healthy grief looks like and no one can discredit what it looks like for you. It’s a personal journey. On days where you are feeling angry, which is likely many, people will hurt you. They don’t always intend to, sometimes they do, but often they don’t. Just like there is no owner’s manual on grieving a loss of a child, there is no manual on how to be there for a friend or family member that has lost a child. Miscarriages are even more unique than that, because they only physically can happen to women. So unless someone is a woman that has had a miscarriage (which is a lot of women, but not ALL), chances are they will not be able to fully understand what to say, what not to say, or even how to look at you. Many times it feels like my wound has healed, though the scab is fresh and new, it has somewhat healed. Then someone […]

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